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Am I a Pushover?

Published on 12/31/2022

When the “storm of the century” was due to hit Chicago right before Christmas, coinciding with our flights out to visit my parents in Santa Barbara, my husband and I decided to move our travel plans up by 2 days and avoid the mess entirely. (Good thing we did.)

We had rented an AirBnB in Santa Barbara but when I reached out to the owner, Tony, I learned it was not available for an early arrival. I didn’t love the idea of spending 2 nights in one rental then moving camp to the original rental for 4 nights. So I looked online and found there were other nice rentals available for all 6 nights, some even cheaper than Tony’s.

Tony, worried that he might lose my booking (he had a 48-hour cancellation, even over the holidays), immediately reached out to colleagues to secure me a 2-night rental that would tide us over until we could move into his place. One of those looked great (and was inexpensive), but again, this plan would require us to move locations.

What to do?

On the one hand, I could cancel Tony’s rental and book a new rental, at the same daily rate or maybe a little less, and with no moving hassle.

On the other hand, I really liked Tony (and his wife Lindsay), who had been super sweet in our communications leading up to our arrival. I also knew they could not get new renters this close to Christmas. And Tony was jumping through hoops to find me a place to tide us over for 2 nights.

I stayed with Tony’s and negotiated a late checkout at the place he helped us secure for 2 nights, and an early checkin at his place so we wouldn’t have to be stranded for the intervening 5 hours.

Am I a pushover? I like to think I did what felt right to me. I would have felt very bad leaving Tony and Lindsay in a lurch for the holidays.

And as it turns out, both homes worked out great and the moving hassle was minimal. And just my luck, I came down with the flu and spent most of my time at Tony’s in bed or on the couch (yep, if you’ve been following me, I’ve had RSV, Covid, and the flu in the last 3 months!). Good thing his place was so comfortable.

YOUR TURN: When have you felt torn between two options and what did you do? Tell us in the comments!

HeleneTStelian Musing
I’m Hélène Stelian, the Midlife Mentor with a passion for facilitating personal development in women 40+. Through my THRIVE community, I help introspective, curious, action-oriented women 40+ deepen their journeys of self-discovery and growth—and create their next chapter with courage and intention.

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